Archives for October 2019

In a world where mass shootings have become chillingly commonplace, parents are naturally hesitant to let their teens venture off to concerts and other crowded public places with friends.

Like many families the shock and horror of what happened at a recent concert in Las Vegas and a few month ago in Manchester have been a major topic of conversation in our house. We are music fans and concert-goers and these senseless attacks hit us hard. The images of people running, injured and scared and frantic, are devastating. So we talk. We talk not only about the news as it comes in, but also about “now what?”

My daughter, Hannah, and I want a share a bit about what those conversations are like.

Eric: My first inclination is that you’re not going to a show without me. Ever. Like never. But that’s really not possible. Or likely. Or fair. Or right. I know that going to shows with your friends, at your age, is the best. I remember those shows. So we have to figure it out.

Hannah: I’m going to a show with my friend in a couple of weeks. We only bought two tickets. Let’s figure it out.

And so we came up with a plan, an action plan. We’re calling it “14 ways your 14 year-old daughter can go to show with her 14 year-old friend.” If you have things to add to it, we don’t mind if you change the title.

1. My parents are putting a data plan on my phone so that I don’t have to rely on access to Wifi if I need it to reach them.
2. I’ll keep a fully-charged extra battery (and cord) in my purse.
3. We will have a confirmed meeting place inside the venue where my parents can access without a ticket.
4. We will have a secondary meeting place outside the venue in case of emergency.
5. We’re going to look at a map of the venue and we will choose and use venue entrances that are not the “main” ones because it will be less crowded and easier to meet up.
6. I will keep a contact card with emergency contact information inside my iPhone case and an ID card with my name and contact information for my parents will be in my pocket or purse in case I lose my phone. At 14, I don’t have a driver’s licence.
7. I will make sure that I have phone numbers in my contacts for all of my family (ie., grandparents, aunts and uncles, etc.).
8. My parents will have the phone numbers for my friend that I’m going to the show with and their parents and vice versa.
9. I will always have a 20-dollar bill for emergency ONLY in my purse. (A concert t-shirt is not an emergency, says my Dad. But looking at his t-shirt collection, you would think otherwise).
10. We will hang back in our seats after the show ends and let the crowd thin out a bit. Even 10 minutes will be thousands of people less leaving at the same time.
11. My parents will be having dinner across the street and I’ll know where they are. 5 minutes away.
12. We will stick together. When one of us goes to the bathroom or to get a drink, we both go. Always. No exceptions.
13. We will check in throughout the show – the first time will be when I get to my seat and again when the show is over.
14. I will ask venue staff if I need help or directions.

A PS from Eric (aka Dad):

And because I have the benefit of having more concert-going experience and knowledge than most, there a couple of things that I want to add, as a parent:

• Many venues for shows that are attended by this age group have designated spaces inside for parents/guardians to hang out. If the venue has this, I’m there.

• I will only buy her tickets for seats – not general admission or floors. In a chaotic situation, that space could get dangerous and I know that she’s safer in a seat in the stands. Picture it, you know what I mean.

• Because I’m sometimes on social media, I might follow the tweets from reporters who are live-tweeting the show. Just keeping an eye on it.

This is what feels right for us, for now. It could change. We’ve all seen how fast our comfort zones can change. Only you know, what yours is and it will be right for you.

With love and strength to Manchester, Ariana Grande and her team.

 

By Eric Alper, publicist and music commentator, and his daughter Hannah. Read more about them at www.thatericalper.com

 

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Every couple needs a night out as often as their schedules – and babysitters – allow. But with the hassle of leaving the kids with a sitter, along with the ever-increasing price to go over the bridge, it’s probably easier to stay close to home. So we’ve compiled ten different ideas for date night (and on some occasions, daytime dates) that are right here on the Island. There’s something for everyone!

See a live show.

See a concert, watch a play, hear one of your favorite stand-up comedians live – those are just a few of the St. George Theatre’s many offerings showcased on its historical stage. If you and your sweetie are big fans of live music, you can catch free live concerts on the South Beach boardwalk and in various parks throughout the Island all summer long. For more information on those events, check siparent-com.go-vip.net/summer later on this month.

Hit the lanes.

Up for some friendly competition? Challenge your darling at one of the Island’s two major bowling alleys — Rab’s Country Lanes on Hylan Boulevard or Showplace Entertainment Center off Victory Boulevard. Make it interesting: the winner gets to pick where to grab dinner afterward.

Go for a stroll.

Staten Island is home to myriad scenic spots where you can enjoy the view before spreading out a picnic. Take in the picturesque beauty of Snug Harbor‘s many botanical gardens: The New York Chinese Scholar Garden, The Rose Garden, even The Secret Garden, just to name a few. Be sure to snap a photo together under The Allee, the iconic tunnel arch. Stroll along the FDR Boardwalk to smell the salty sea air amidst the stunning backdrop of the Verrazano Bridge. Go buy a bag of food and feed the ducks together at Clove Lakes Park (just make sure you only throw duck food pellets because bread and other human food may grow bacteria that can harm the ducks).

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Take a class.

Learn something new together and who knows, you may end up sharing a lifelong hobby. Casa Belvedere offers cooking classes for adults where you can learn tactics for making delicious Italian food. At Pinot’s Palette on Ellis Street or  Forest Avenue, or at Paint with a Twist in New Dorp, you’ll create original artwork together (with the added bonus of sipping wine while you work). Ed Perpetua Tennis Academy offers a Friday night walk-in class for adults, beginners welcome. Many local museums offer classes as well. For example, the Alice Austen House offers photography workshops throughout the year. The Noble Maritime Collection at Snug Harbor offers free knitting on Thursdays. The Garibaldi Meucci Museum offers Italian language classes. Check individual museum websites for their schedule of upcoming events.

Try something new.

Are you and your spouse the adventurous types? Here are a few new ideas you may yet not have tried.
• Wheel Fun Rentals lets you cruise the boardwalk in a variety of pedal-powered vehicles, including surreys, tandem bikes, and other specialty cycles.
• Geocaching is a real life treasure hunt that sends you to various spots using GPS coordinates.
• Supreme Chocolatier takes participants on a tour inside the factory where you can even sample some indulgent chocolate for just $4 per person.
• The National Lighthouse Museum‘s popular Lighthouse Boat Tours usually run once a month and feature spectacular views of the New York Harbor and the Jersey Shoreline.
• Kayak Staten Island offers weekend kayaking off the shores of South Beach entirely for free.
• Staten Island is home to 2,800 acres of rugged Greenbelt where you can hike, run, or even ride a bike.
• Go stargazing in Gateway Great Kills National Park on a clear night with the Amateur Astronomers Association.

Just relax.

Pampering yourselves with a relaxing massage after a busy week is a great way to slow down and enjoy time together. Relax on Cloud 9 on Clove Road and A.F. Bennett on New Dorp Lane both offer special packages for couples looking to enjoy some tranquil time together.

Get a room.

Need a little alone time? Sometimes a few hours away is just not enough. Book a room at the beautiful Hilton Garden Inn on South Avenue, where you can have dinner and drinks at Lorenzo’s Restaurant and then head up to the room to enjoy a peaceful night together.

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Watch a ballgame.

There’s no need to travel all the way to the Bronx to see the Yankees play. The Staten Island Yankees minor league team plays at the Richmond County Bank Ballpark on the North Shore from June to September. You can buy tickets for a specially-themed game or even view a postgame fireworks show on select nights throughout the summer.

Catch a flick.

Check out the latest blockbusters at one of Staten Island’s two major theaters — The Atrium on Arthur Kill Road or The United Artists Theatre on Forest Avenue. There’s also the Island’s first dine-in movie theatre coming to Hylan Boulevard, although you’ll unfortunately have to wait until 2019 for it to open.

Grab a bite.

The Island is jam-packed with eateries boasting stunning views and even better food. Enjoy dinner overlooking the Atlantic at the Marina Cafe or South Fin Grill. Cozy up with lunch in the park at the Stone House at Clove Lakes. Get happy for Happy Hour at the South Shore Bar & Grill (also on the water). Can’t narrow it down to just one restaurant? Try an exciting restaurant crawl hosted by a local merchant’s association. Check out the siparent-com.go-vip.net calendar for dates to upcoming crawls.

Go museum hopping.

There are so many museums and cultural institutions in Staten Island, you could never visit them all in one day (although it might be fun to try!). There’s plenty of material to spark fresh conversation for the most cultured of couples. Immerse yourself in Italian culture at the Garibaldi Meucci Museum; see how Staten Islanders lived during colonial times at Historic Richmond Town; explore the many artifacts and exhibits at the Staten Island Museum. For a complete list of local museums, go to siparent-com.go-vip.net/museums.

By Jeannine Cintron, a Staten Island mom of two who hasn’t had a date night in a while and could really use a night out (hint hint, hubby).

As the school year winds down, your weeknights are probably getting busier. Projects, recitals, playoff games, summer planning – you barely have time to eat, never mind cook a whole meal. We’ve compiled a list of quick and easy dinners with minimal steps and ingredients that you can whip up to satisfy your family any night of the week.

Grilled Steak with Pineapple Rice

1/4 cup lower-sodium soy sauce
4 4-ounce beef tenderloin fillets
1 8-ounce can pineapple slices in juice, drained
6 green onions
2 8.8-ounce packages precooked brown rice

1. Combine soy sauce, pepper, and beef in a large zip-top plastic bag. Massage sauce into beef; let stand at room temperature 7 minutes, turning bag occasionally.
2. While steak marinates, heat a large grill pan over medium-high heat. Coat pan with cooking spray. Arrange pineapple and green onions in pan; cook 5 minutes or until well charred, turning to char evenly. Cut onions and pineapple into bite-sized pieces. Heat rice according to package directions; stir in pineapple, onions, and salt. Keep warm.

From CookingLight.com


Turkey Scaloppine

1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1 1/4 teaspoons Cajun seasoning, divided
1 1/2 pounds chicken or turkey cutlets
2 tablespoons olive oil
1 cup dry white wine

1. Combine flour and 1 tsp. Cajun seasoning in a shallow dish; dredge turkey cutlets in flour mixture, shaking off excess.
2. Cook turkey in hot oil in a large skillet over medium-high heat 1 to 2 minutes on each side or until done. Transfer to a serving platter, and keep warm.
3. Add wine and remaining 1/4 tsp. Cajun seasoning to skillet; cook 1 to 2 minutes or until liquid is reduced by half, stirring to loosen particles from bottom of skillet. Drizzle sauce over turkey. Serve with roasted veggies. You can substitute turkey for chicken cutlets.

From MyRecipes.com

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Black Bean Quesadillas

1 15-ounce can black beans, rinsed
½ cup shredded Monterey Jack cheese
½ cup salsa
4 8-inch whole-wheat tortillas
2 teaspoons canola oil, divided
1 ripe avocado, diced

1. Combine beans, cheese and ¼ cup salsa in a medium bowl. Place tortillas on a work surface. Spread ½ cup filling on half of each tortilla. Fold tortillas in half, pressing gently to flatten.
2. Heat 1 tsp. oil in a large nonstick skillet over medium heat. Add two quesadillas and cook, turning once, until golden on both sides, 2 to 4 minutes total. Transfer to a cutting board and tent with foil to keep warm. Repeat with the remaining 1 tsp. oil and quesadillas. Serve the quesadillas with avocado and the remaining salsa.

From EatingWell.com

Fajita Chicken Bake

3-4 boneless skinless chicken breasts
1-2 teaspoons taco seasoning
2 bell peppers in assorted colors, deseeded and thinly sliced
1 red onion, peeled and thinly sliced
1-2 tablespoons olive oil
½ cup shredded cheddar or Mexican blend cheese

1. Trim the chicken breasts then lay them in a single layer in a glass baking dish.
2. Sprinkle the taco seasoning over the top of the chicken breast to taste. Lay your thinly sliced onions and peppers on top of the chicken breast, spread out evenly over the top. Drizzle the olive oil over the peppers and onions. Sprinkle cheese over the top of the dish.
3. Bake at 375 F for 35-45 minutes or until chicken is cooked though and the juices run clear.

From Buzzfeed.com

Shrimp and Zucchini Scampi

1 1/2 pounds shelled, deveined shrimp
2 tablespoons oil
2 medium zucchini, sliced
4 cloves garlic, chopped
4 tablespoons butter
3/4 cup white wine
1 pound linguine, cooked
2 teaspoons lemon peel, grated
Chopped parsley, for serving

1. Cook shrimp in oil 3 minutes or until cooked through, turning once. Transfer shrimp to plate.
2. To skillet, add zucchini, garlic, and butter. Cook 3 minutes. Add white wine and salt; cook 2 minutes, stirring and scraping.
3. Toss vegetables with shrimp linguine, ¼ cup pasta cooking water, lemon peel, and parsley.

From GoodHousekeeping.com

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I’ll admit– I was not super hands-on as a dad. My first child was born back in the late 1970s, a time when not as much was expected from guys in the daddy-duty department yet. The fact that I could change a diaper (if my wife wasn’t going to be back anytime soon) redeemed me as a modern dad. As subsequent kids came along, my job, on days we were taking them out somewhere, was to keep them from getting dirty as my wife dressed them and handed them off to me. The diaper bags, snacks, etc. miraculously appeared near the front door to be loaded into the car.

While my wife took the lion’s share (or should I say lioness?) of day-to-day child rearing, I worked hard at my city job, put in lots of overtime, and eventually earned my retirement at the age of 50. The children are now grown, and my wife has been back to working outside of the house.

Peace and quiet at last!

Fast-forward a few years, and another generation starts occupying that quiet space in my life. Babies in the form of grandchildren continue being born at that rate of one a year, while their parents have to work, or have to manage busy schedules around pick up/drop off, sick kids, school holidays, etc. Who is home, has a driver’s license, a pulse, and is available? You guessed it! Throw a couple of carseats in the back seat of my car (gratis from my kids, of course) and upgrade my flip phone to an iPhone with GPS and tracking capabilities, and I’m good to go!

Now I get excited when Disney releases a new movie and I can tell you which movie theater has a “family” bathroom so I can take a granddaughter without the gut-wrenching fear of hearing “I gotta go!” before we get home.

I know the best entrance to use in Snug Harbor, how to get through the maze of buildings—and how to get around the crew on the days they are filming a movie there.

I know how to cook up a batch of oatmeal with fresh fruit and hide the probiotics in it.

I know which classmates/teammates also have peanut allergies, and I ALWAYS know the whereabouts of the EpiPen.

I know how early you have to get to Trader Joe’s so they won’t run out of the organic English cucumbers.

I know where the F5 soccer field is on Miller Field, and which is the closest parking lot to use when the game is there.

I never miss Santa Claus at dancing school, Opening Day (or practically any other game day) at Little League, or Art Exhibit day at preschool. Hell, I can even fill in at a Gymboree class and pop those bubbles with the best of them!

When I look back and compare the 70s dad with the new me, it makes me laugh. There are now six tiny humans who call me Pa. For that, and for this second chance (third, if you count my own!) at experiencing childhood, I’m eternally thankful. Life is indeed GRAND!

Happy Fathers Day to all!

By Staten Island grandfather Domenick Friscia, who is making the most of his retirement by spending tons of quality time with his grandchildren, and then driving them back to their own homes. Thank God!

An important aspect of helping kids develop into responsible adults is teaching them the value and rewards of hard work and earning their own money. Through this they gain self-esteem, come to understand the real value of a dollar, and become more thoughtful in the way they spend money. Here are some ideas you can explore with your preteen or teen for ways they can cash in this summer.

The grass is always greener – What better way to soak up the sun, get fit, and make spare cash all at once, than mowing lawns? Create fliers mentioning that you live in the neighborhood and include your phone number and your fees. (Base this on yard size and keep them below the cost of professional services.) Deliver the fliers to the homes in your neighborhood, lodged between doorknobs or tucked under mats. Never place anything in mailboxes.

Young entrepreneur – Make the most of neighbors’ garage sales by setting up a refreshment stand in your own front yard. All you need is a small table and a handmade sign. Set out a pitcher of lemonade, disposable cups, and wrapped cookies.

Too old for toys and games? – Clean out those you’ve outgrown and hold a sale. Make a sign to attract neighborhood kids and passersby, and lay out blankets in your front yard, and spread out your goods. Keep your prices reasonable, and don’t forget a bargain box filled with odds and ends.

Kiddie care –If you are old enough to stay home alone, you may be ready to care for other children. Spread the word through family, friends, and neighbors. When babysitting, play games and do activities with the kids, and avoid talking on the phone or watching TV. Parents love sitters that keep their children busy. Also, don’t forget to clean up and wash dirty dishes.

A little dirt never hurt – Garage cleaning is a big chore for most people, so your services may be especially welcome. When you get a job, be thorough, and move everything into the driveway or yard before you begin. Remove cobwebs with a broom, sweep ledges and the garage floor, and then hose the garage concrete (with permission) to loosen ground-in dirt. Get an end of lease cleaning in Brisbane for the tenacious dirt stuck on ledges and perform deep cleaning. When it’s dry, neatly arrange everything back into the garage.

Fence finishing – Wood fencing requires ongoing maintenance, so offer to assist your neighbors in sprucing up their yard by painting or staining their fences. The homeowner should supply the paint or stain and the necessary tools. Be sure to follow directions, and take your time to do a careful job. Read up on some common questions around deer fences since their proper maintenance and set up are crucial to their functioning properly. No one wants their gardens trashed by pest so be diligent.

Window washing – Offering your services for this dreaded task is sure to be a success. If you get the job, make sure your parents know the homeowner and approve of you going inside. Clean the interior of all windows, including doors, and don’t forget to open the windows and clean the ledges and tracks. If you are tall enough to reach exterior windows without a ladder, ask permission to hose them down to loosen dirt before washing and drying them.

Life’s a zoo –Pet owners who don’t like to kennel are often in a dilemma at vacation time. Pass out fliers in your neighborhood, and offer to pet sit. Do the sitting in your home or fenced yard, if your parents agree. Otherwise, make regular visits to the pet’s home. Be responsible, and do exactly as the pet owner instructs, for both your safety and the pet’s.

Weeds away – Are weeds taking over your neighbors’ flowerbeds? Then offer to get them back into shape. Before you get started, find out which are plants, or flowers that have not yet bloomed. When in doubt, ask before you pull them. Wear gloves to protect your hands, and hose the ground lightly to loosen roots. Pull weeds from rock beds, shrubbery, and cement cracks. Then dispose of them properly.

Dollars for duds– Have you hit another growth spurt? Ask your parents if you can consign your clothing and split the profits. Look for consignment shops under “resale,” “clothing – used,” or “consignment.” Find out their policies, and then get your clothing ready. Wash and dewrinkle, then hang or fold it neatly. Don’t forget shoes, jackets, and pajamas, too.

Errands for the elderly – Are there handicapped, disabled, or elderly persons in your neighborhood that may need some help? Offer to run errands within walking or biking distance. Attach a basket to your bike or carry a backpack for easy transporting. If you have your driver’s license, offer to do more distant runs.

Who’s walking who? – If you’re looking for a new summer pal, why not make it man’s best friend? Pass out fliers to offer your pet walking services.

Make it shine – Round up your friends, and get ready for some cool, wet fun! Hold a car wash in your driveway or a parking lot, with permission from the property owner. Make a large colorful “Car Wash” sign, and include your cost – no more than your local car wash charges. Have your supplies handy: a bucket of soapy water, rags or sponge, a hose, and plenty of dry towels.

News courier – Hop on your bike or blades, and spread the news—that is, deliver the news. Apply for a route with your local newspaper, or add your name to the waiting list. Place newspapers either in a newspaper box or on the front porch, and make sure they’ll remain dry. It may even increase your tips.

At your service – Offer homecleaning services to your neighbors, and plan to do the following tasks, unless other arrangements are made. Dust furniture and window ledges; vacuum carpet and stairs; sweep and mop tile, linoleum, and wooden floors; scour sinks, bathtubs, and toilets; shake out rugs; vacuum upholstered furniture; and make beds. Find out which cleaning products (supplied by the homeowner) to use on fixtures, appliances, and furniture, to prevent damage.

Pool patrol – If sunbathing is your thing, then this is the job for you! Find out the age and certification requirements for lifeguard duty, and then apply at a community pool, YMCA, or nearby beach. While keeping an eye on swimmers, keep your skin safe by using a good sunscreen.

Daycare duty – Do you love little kids? I mean lots of little kids? Then contact local daycare centers and home daycare providers, and find out if they’re in need of a young assistant. Tasks may include assisting with crafts and activities, reading stories, helping with lunch and snacks, and cleaning up.

Nurturer of nature – If you’re a nature lover, don’t forget about your local parks. Possible positions may include assisting with planned activities and events, maintaining park grounds, and tending ticket booths. Call area parks to find out what jobs they offer and how to apply.

Tips for business success

Follow these tips to keep the loot rolling in and to play it safe.

• Get your parents’ permission before accepting a job, and make sure they know where you’ll be.

• Dress for the type of job, and wear old clothes if they could be ruined.

• Discuss payment in advance to avoid disputes or hard feelings.

• Do your best. Not only will you earn respect and feel good about yourself, it will likely affect whether you are hired again and can use that person as a reference.

• If you make a mistake, don’t ignore it or try to cover it up. Inform your employer, offer your apologies, and ask what can be done. Your honesty will likely make your employer overlook the error.

• Be on time. Call right away, if you’ll be late or can’t make it.

 

By Kimberly Blaker